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'The priest said, 'Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to see that woman again.For your penance, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box.'The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box.He paused for a moment and then started to leave.The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, 'I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!'The Irishman replied, 'Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that's the same as putting it in!'Lemon SqueezeThere once was a religious young woman who went toConfession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.'The priest said, 'Confess your sins and be forgiven.'The young woman said, 'Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.'The priest thought long and hard and then said,'Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.' The young woman asked, 'Will this cleanse me. "Erm...you're married now Karmen, it's not like old times." The moment I said those words, I felt proud of my brain for its response and my cock cursed it. Brain one, cock two. "Well okay, but I just thought we could get rid of it and enjoy the rest of the night talking without you being distracted by your hard-on." What she said suddenly made a lot of sense. Was this now my brain or my cock agreeing with her logic? She kept looking at me as if to change my mind or come up with some words of wisdom. "I have an idea then," I said after a long pause. "What if I get rid of this hard on while you watch?" She smiled that sly little smile again and nodded. I untied the robe but didn't take it off, just kind of opened it up and let it drop to my sides. I shifted myself into position, getting comfortable on the bed. Soon as it was free. My cock jumped up like a springboard and I could swear I heard a little gasp escape Karmen’s lips. With my right hand, I ran my index finger and thumb.
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